Monday, July 4, 2011

geography is lame.

grand canyon.  not impressed.

"Mom, Nick says I'm dramatic."
Mom turns, eyebrows raised
"I think it's just a part of who you are"

Okay, so I'm dramatic.  So I dabble in hyperbole.  So I offend and confuse people with my blanket statements on just about everything...  My point being that I hate the petrified forest.  I bet you didn't see that one coming.  Yeah.  Turns out the petrified forest is mega lame.  Trust me, I drove through it.  It's in Arizona.  The temperature?  110 degrees fahrenheit.  That's 29 degrees celsius.  My dramatic streak leans toward fahrenheit.  This is beside the point.

Quick!  What do you think of when you hear forest?  You think of trees that are standing up.  This is not what the petrified forest is like.  The trees didn't get petrified standing up- you can think "Duh" but you shouldn't.  Petrified wood is wood that is more boring than regular wood.  It was so boring it turned itself into STONE instead of the living thing it once was.  Then it moved to the desert.  Maybe sin made the petrified forest.  Or maybe it's where the garden of eden was and the angel got bored and burned it down with it's sword of holy fire.  We all know once holy fire burns something it doesn't grow back.  It's like Round Up in that way.

"you made me get out of the car in 110 degree weather for this?"
The National government charges ten dollars to drive through 29 miles of deserted desert with rock trees on it.  They employ a person to work in a desolate booth and say "Please don't steal the petrified wood." My point being that there should be no deficit when the govt is raking in hundreds of dollars DAILY from a desert tourist attraction.

My rant is done on the petrified forest.

2 comments:

Katie Durski said...

hahah that is not a forest. agreed.

Filia Dei said...

At least Nick and Molly had a good time. But, to be fair to you, I would not have been happy with those circumstances in your condition either.