ABC, easy as 123... Or is it?

Lately I've been feeling really upset about roadkill. It must be awful to be hit so intensely that your body actually explodes. Somebody needs to have a conference for wildlife and be like "Those large, loud machines on four wheels...yeah, you won't win that race" But unfortunately wildlife can't talk. Or listen. Glad to clarify that for you in case you weren't aware.
School- I'm upset. I'm upset with parents who don't send their children to school with food or coats or love. It's not fair. Every child deserves to be loved! And some of them just AREN'T. They aren't cherished or taken care of or taken responsibility for. When an 8 year old forgets to do their homework? I mean, my mom sat with me every day and we did my homework together. I sat at the table as she cooked dinner. Some kids are watching their parents do crystal meth, I wouldn't do my homework either! I didn't know teaching would be like psychology. I take on the burdens of 24 little children every day. When they mess up in school and are clingy, what am I to them? It is super tough to love all of them all the time. I didn't birth them! But I worry about them. I wonder what it's like at their house. Why are parents recently super messing up their children? :( My poor little class. So while I fully intended to plan Math and Green/Red band and modify some BCR's (For you none MSA generation that is breif constructed response aka essay) but I just FELL asleep on the couch for two hours. I remember my fateful professor Teena who dedicated an entire period of the semester to stress management. I didn't get it. I get it now. Teaching= emotional exhaustion. Each child requires attention that I can't give in the time that I have. Which then leads me to stress eat. And while my husband is busy burning off the fat at bootcamp, I am EXTRA busy packing on the stress pounds. I was sitting on the couch and just wishing that when I came home he would be sitting in the recliner ready to listen to me vent about my day and then encourage me. But he's not. He's gone and I can't call him. I'm sure he feels the same way. Some days I feel like saying to my class "My husband is gone, can you just please behave? I am an emotional black hole" But children think teachers are robots and get freaked out when they express emotion beyond anger at calling out. Think back... did you ever see a teacher cry? I bet it rocked your world.
Example: Ms. Battiligni-sixth grade-middle of the Mesopotamia unit-never figured out what it was about...still wondering.
I miss my husband,
Kaley

Where you be at is it?

I heard some old school DC talk in the car today while driving home. It made me think back to a simpler time in my life... when I loved DC talk. You wish there was more to the story than that, but there isn't. I just like them. Once I reordered their "Supernatural" CD. Yeah, we should stick to "Jesus Freak" or... "I don't want your sex".
Okay, My mother says some people get their energy from people and others feel that being with people sucks their soul into an abyss of exhaustion. You know, she didn't really word it that way, but you get my point. You know what makes me mad? Children who like positive AND negative attention. I tried to teach them the meaning of apathy, but I don't think they got the point. I had to bribe a student with a lead pencil if no one tattled on him. He basically injures and harrasses other students behind my back. And he is REALLY good at it. I think he hones his art at every possible opportunity. He was under the impression that every time he... well... didn't injure anyone that he would get a reward. And that's why I go to bed worried about the next generation every night. We got to read "The Boy Who Didn't Believe in Spring" today. It was about a boy who was looking for Spring. And all the while he spoke in Jive slang from the seventies. "Where is it at?" Oh and did I mention his name is King Shabazz. Don't ask me, I don't get it. And neither did they. Thanks Open Court for this peice of crap contribution to the educational society. But on the flip side I drew a PRETTY sweet birds nest to introduce the concept of city wildlife. And the kids wrote in the eggs. AND I'm doing a spider sort for ... the Harvest AKA Halloween or the Devil's holiday.
Here is an analogy for you:
Teaching is to laminating as Children are to trampolines. Didn't you hardcore want a trampoline when you were a kid? I did. I asked and I received. Then it wasn't as cool. The same is with laminating. I am always trying to get people to laminate stuff for me. Not only because children have the destructive force of a herd of rhinos or cage full of cornish pixies, but because I hate doing it so much. I was so jealous of it as a student. I thought teaching would be all sock puppets and laminating. Like a heavenly craft hopscotch. Oh well.
I fear I am rambling, but that's what happens when you talk to the cat all evening. I might buy myself a crazy cat lady figurine.
Love, Kaley

Back to School Blues

Let's just say- there is a reason Teaching is listed in most of the top ten stressful jobs list. Now, I'm not inferring I'm more stressed out than, say, a brain surgeon or even someone who wrestles disgruntled alligators for a living. BUT Teaching is up there. As I smoothed a band aid over a child's elbow, resolved a conflict about somebody calling some else a "cry baby", stopped someone from tripping another student, answered 100 questions, resolved a situation where a child had an "accident" (#2), and flipped more cards than I have ever flipped in a day which reacted in a cry fest (Who's a cry baby NOW?!) I thought... I don't get paid enough. I guess there is more thanks to teaching than being a trash guy, but I bet they are not stressed if they mess up on the job. I mean, I do have a lot of support at home, Kitty is a grade A listener. Standardized testing, teaching to the test, NOT teaching to the test...
Today I was like "I wish we could make friendly orange pom pom pumpkins for Halloween" Two problems with this scenario. I would somehow have to align it with the Maryland Voluntary State Curriculum (Text feature BCR?) and also have to pretend that it wasn't related to Halloween due to your friendly neighborhood Jehovah's witness. Spooky Harvest Party anyone? Well, I mean we wouldn't be celebrating... how about "Spooky treat snack break in the middle of an insignificant Friday afternoon"?? I remember doing really fun things in college. I think schools put sleepers into colleges to like SUCK innocent people into the teaching career. I feel like I got no job training, in the field at least. They just kind of dropped you into a pool of blood thirsty sharks. And I don't even mean just children! Okay, I'm sounding kind of bitter and I do apoligize. A wise professor- Teena- once told me one must "Choose your attitude" each and every single day. She was so right! I was feeling inclined to writing her a letter recently:
"Dear Teena,
I was not on fire for teaching today. In fact, I would say I taught with the passion and tenacity of a wet napkin. Teaching is hard. I did not choose my attitude. I also made several children cry out of a campaign of fear and intimidation instead of nurturing a positive learning environment. I guess you could say I made some bad choices and let some 'teachable moments' sink through the sewer hole of life. Though I am forever grateful for your collegiate instruction, I fear I did not take your words to heart today.
Love, your student!"
What do you think she would say???
OK, reality check. I care too much. I love teaching. Why must I love what hurts me and is hard? Like a military husband and a tough as nails career? I will live for the greater good, but I'm just saying I'd rather be a rich house wife with a butler and independently wealthy spouse.
LOVE, Kaley

Bald best friend

Well, first of all, I have overcome my illness and I DID stay home on Tuesday! It was super fun being sick all alone, but my sweet mother came to visit me so that was good. Everyone at school was under the impression that I was deathly ill-which is partially true because it's got to take something particularly nasty to get a teacher to leave school w/out lesson plans. Anyway, I was thankful for their concern. I was thinking about Nick being at OCS and having all of his hair shaved off. Also, he has to shave TWICE a day. Okay, I just can't imagine it. At all.
This is how Nick prefers to look:

When I first met Sir Nick he had the BIGGEST blonde curly fro ever which only was achieved the summer before our SR year of high school.

So, thinking of my hubby bald and clean shaven is a little overwhelming. HOWEVER, his face will be such a welcome sight that I will quickly overcome any surprise over his lack of locks.
Sorry to blog about an absent spouse, but sometimes I like to pretend he is here.
Love, Kaley

If your gonna spew, spew into this

Well, today was a little tough. I woke up feeling nauseous, but being a school teacher I thought I could tough it out right? Nope. I had to go home early, which is really good because as soon as I got home I "lost my lunch" as some may say. The whole day I was imagining scenarios "If I do blow chunks, what will the children do?" One Student graciously gave me the advice "When my tummy hurts my mom says to drink Sprite!!" and then warned the class "Beeeeeeee QUIET! Her tummy hurts!" while my bilingual student calls out "What's a tummy?"
And I would like to thank the education profession for those three months off, but I still feel craptastic and I'm thinking "I can't write sub plans, I don't know what I copied for tomorrow", but I am feeling barfy again. Which is really unfortunate. :( I don't know what to do. And I don't want to waste my days in case I want to take them when Nick comes home, but I also don't want to risk barfing on eight year olds tomorrow.
The life of a teacher, Jealous?
Love, Kaley, Kitty and her barf bucket

Me, Myself, and I

Just wanted you to know that I am still alive though I haven't blogged in... a few days. Here are a few things you might want to know about. I went with my parents up to Towson to visit Marshall, Nicole, Gisela and Xander... and my brother helped create some of the cutest babies/toddlers on the planet. (In my own biased opinion). See below! Sorry I suck at photography.

Also on the husband front, whom I am so proud of, he got to call me for 10 minutes yesterday. Not enough. He has a cold, but nothing too tough. He starts classes soon and will have to start studying hardcore. In three weeks he has this major inspection where everything has to be pristine and clothes can have no threads etc etc...I am still very much missing Nick. I have a hard time getting to bed, I just feel restless without his comforting presence in my life. I actually feel like I'm in a movie or something. It just doesn't feel real w/out him and it feels like it can't be that long till he comes back, but I will persevere and get through.
My mother bought me some autumnal accents for my living room and they have really spiced up my life here at home.I know my navy placemat underneath is a bit tacky, but I didn't have anything else. Give me time, my house will be precisely coordinated. And featured in fine furnishing magazines...
Heidi makes me really sad (From The Hills) What if she needs Lauren back but she fears to lose Spencer just in case no one else can love her after this music video?? (Honestly, if laughter is the best medicine you need to check this out...unless you are not shallow and don't care about The Hills)

Love, Kaley & Kitty and Nick in spirit

"I love technology, but not as much as you and me. Always and forever..."

Yesterday as I was driving home from my parents house I saw a little white mouse run across the road. Miraculously he made it! Then I thought- this should be a children's book! Come on a book about a little white mouse that gets lost from his family and goes on adventures... and then I remembered... I think that was the plot of Ralph S. Mouse (The Mouse and the Motorcycle) and also Stuart Little. Turns out I'm not as creative as I think.
I made a Digiorno pizza today and it really didn't taste like delivery. Anyone fooled by that pizza is a fool.




Today I had a good teacher day. I got to play with the Smart Board. For those of you who are not familiar with said board it lets you draw and move computer pictures on it just as Tom Cruise does in the futuristic thriller "Minority Report". The reason I chose this photo from google images is because I like how the children are behaving and also I used the word Echinoderm on this very blog about three to four blogs ago. Smart board is the bomb. Anything is more fun with it. I can write in rainbow colors, highlight, import images, and basically it makes teaching more fun. Seriously, this is a behavior management WONDER. I could hear them whispering behind my back "It writes in red, green, black, AND blue!"
"I want her to use the rainbow pen!" "She can move things with her hands!"
Ironically friends, because the county I work for is a technological hypocrite, as I was playing with my Smart board the tech lady came in to pronounce my computer DEAD and left with no further explanation. I'm going to peace out and eat a HUGE bowl of ice cream. I will eat away my loneliness and nothing says friend like a bowl of chocolate ice cream!
Love Kaley and Kitty (Who will lick the bowl when I'm done and actually have a positive outlet for her obsession)

PS Can't wait to see the top three of Project Runway tonight!